Reflection on a calabash

By Kate O'Donnell
September/October 2010

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The highlights of my mission in Guyana were the times when, like the calabash, I allowed my heart to be split open.

A calabash is a hard gourd that has many uses after it is split open. In Guyana, I learned that the flesh inside is not edible but does have medicinal uses. For instance, it can help to cure a cold or a fever depending on the leaves that are boiled with it. Rubbed on a dog or cat, the calabash flesh is said to kill any fleas on the animal.

After serving in Guyana, Scarboro lay missioner Kate O’Donnell returned to Canada to coordinate Scarboro’s Lay Mission Office along with Mary Olenick.

Once the inside is scooped out, the calabash shell can be used as a scoop for bathing and is a perfect material for making cups, bowls, and utensils. I’ve seen calabash gourds painted with designs and used as decorations. Bags and earrings can be made from them and some people use the empty gourds for holding trinkets and jewelry. The flesh blown out of a whole calabash through a small hole leaves a perfect shell that can be filled with dried beans to make maracas.

The highlights of my mission in Guyana were the times when, like the calabash, I allowed my heart to be split open and used as an open vessel. Just as the flesh inside the calabash is boiled and mixed with bush herbs, when I was soaked in prayer and simmering in God’s love, this love could be poured out to others.

When I was with the dying, especially Angela who had AIDS and a terrible skin disease, all she hungered for was to be loved and touched. God’s love simmering in my heart reached out to touch her frail body. And it was Jesus who smiled back at me.

As I offered a drink to Bibi, also suffering from AIDS and living in a broken down home, it was Jesus who took my hand and whispered, “Thank you.”

Like the calabash, my heart may feel empty, but God uses this empty vessel. As an empty vessel I can take in the burdens of others. I can listen and just be there. They fill me with their trust and faith in God, and the calabash is full again.

As I shared a meal with the children and listened to their stories, out of their poverty I was filled with their joy. My joy was poured out to the shut-ins and their gratitude filled me again to overflowing.

My heart spilled over as I sat with the homeless and their toothless smiles filled me with a deep peace. My peace was poured out as I helped haul water for the poor and I was filled with God’s living waters.

Kate and the calabash tree

Even when I felt drained and that I had nothing to offer, like the calabash I could be used just by my being... being patient, being a listening heart. Just by being I was once more filled with love flowing from the hearts of the poor to mine.

When I filled the empty calabash shell with trinkets of selfishness, pride, righteousness, and arrogance, then there was no room for God’s healing portions. To avoid being full with these trinkets, every night I emptied myself, not only of the trinkets, but also of the challenges, joys, and sorrows of the day. And God’s love filled me anew, simmering in my heart ready to be poured out again, and again, and again.

God pours living waters into me, refreshing me, so that I, in turn, may be a vessel to refresh God’s people— so that I may be the best calabash I can be.

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